How To Play Like An Adult

Congratulations! If you’re reading this, it probably means you’re an adult - or a toddler with a very high IQ. The bad news? Being a grown-up doesn’t come with a manual, which basically means no one knows what they’re doing most of the time. If you’re feeling as lost as a 90-year-old using a smartphone, don’t worry; here are the best ways to convince everyone (and yourself) that you’re a big girl or boy now.

1. Keep busy

The first step to being a grown-up is doing all the things your parents would. The nights of sticky floors, poorly-mixed drinks and stumbling home at 4am are (hopefully) behind you. Celebrate the new mature you with an A-Reserve ticket to an Opera Australia performance or wine tasting in your own home.

Adulthood is also a time for trying new hobbies, so consider something you’ve never thought of like a gold leafing workshop or candle making course. Basically, anything that won’t break a sweat or stir up your dodgy hammy. Set the tempo for your adulthood by renting a Porsche or Eleanor Mustang and imagine you’ve made it as a successful project manager, app developer or dog walker.      

2. Learn to spend money wisely

Your spending habits will have definitely changed since your time as a 15-year-old with a penchant for bandage dresses and ill-fitting footwear. Slip into a pair of Crocs or Scholl shoes to experience the comfort you always fought so hard against. If you’re the multi-tasking type, garden aerating spike shoes work their magic as you walk, even if you’re taking a stroll through someone else’s backyard at 4am to hop the fence into your own.

If you still feel like an under-age fraud, sip on a selection of quality wines and wait until the feelings pass. There’s no judgement if you still haven’t developed an appreciation for fine wines; that’s why Passion Pop exists. Cheers!

3. Treat your home like your castle

If you’re good with your savings or fortunate enough to not live in inner Sydney, you might own your own home. Just like a more expensive version of a mood board, a house can be changed to suit your own tastes and interests. Ambiance is important, so consider purchasing an aromatherapy humidifier to clean the air.

Parting with your beloved *NSYNC posters might be hard, so at least get them professionally framed for a classier, vintage feel. If you’re still on your cleaning training wheels, hire a professional cleaner to help you out, or celebrate your independence by attacking any stain you see with an eraser sponge and hoping for the best.

Finding the transition into adulthood too hard? Make yourself a milkshake, bunker down in a blanket fort, and read about the ways to thrill your inner child instead. Keep checking Groupon for all-ages things to do in your city. We’re here for you, just don’t expect us to wipe your nose when it’s runny.